


Relief

by Squidgilator



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: M/M, Masturbation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:33:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21676819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Squidgilator/pseuds/Squidgilator
Summary: In the moments after their first kiss on the elevator, Levi needs some immediate relief--and finds it.
Relationships: Nico Kim/Levi Schmitt
Comments: 2
Kudos: 46





	Relief

“I thought this was a teaching hospital!” yelled Levi across the hospital lobby after Nico, and then immediately wished he hadn’t. Fuck. He felt like an idiot—a naïve, horny, debauched idiot.

Fuming, Levi turned on his heel and stalked in the opposite direction of Nico’s retreating back, barely aware of his surroundings until he was standing in front of the locker room door. Not knowing what else to do, he slammed inside and collapsed on to the nearest bench, folding his arms over his head with frustration. 

The locker room was miraculously empty and silent except for the muffled sounds of the hospital outside, but Levi couldn’t have heard anything anyway—his ears were ringing as the experience caught up to him. He couldn’t help it—he started to play in his mind’s eye, vividly, each moment of the encounter in the elevator. His mind ground to a halt as he got to the image of himself being pushed back against the wall, and then skittered frantically around those next couple of seconds, playing and replaying the memory of being thoroughly, roughly kissed.

He realized, suddenly, that he was more than half hard in his scrubs, and stared angrily down at his lap. “Seriously?” he muttered aloud, and then glanced guiltily around to make sure nobody had seen him talk to his own dick. 

He closed his eyes and tried to picture his grandmother, but his mind pulled itself unbidden back to the same two second replay of Nico, eyes half-lidded, pushing him against the elevator wall. Rewind—again. Rewind—again. Fuck—he was about to come in his pants. Levi laughed a crazed little laugh and stood up abruptly. He was going to have to deal with this—now. 

There was single-person bathroom in the locker room, and he threw himself into it. Hands trembling, he could barely operate the persnickety lock. Finally, he got the door fastened shut and leaned back against the wall of the bathroom, breathing fast. Eyes closed, he let his brain call up the memory uninhibited as he fumbled his scrubs over his erection. 

It didn’t take much—it was very nearly enough just to wrap his hand around himself and picture Nico’s slender, nimble fingers there instead. He took a deep breath and forced himself to go slowly, savoring the images—images that he had already been guiltily hoarding for weeks but that were now coupled with actual, honest-to-God memory—that flashed through his head. 

A minute later and he came into his hand with a groan. The next thing he knew, he found himself sitting on the floor of the bathroom without any recollection of consciously leaving a standing position. He let himself sit there for a minute, his breathing coming back to normal. He knew he should get back to the hospital floor, but he also knew he couldn’t walk out onto the floor looking like he most likely did now.

After a minute he rose and began to clean himself up. As he washed his hands, he looked at himself in the mirror, looking for signs of—something. He felt different, but he didn’t know exactly how. Something had changed; some weight had been lifted.  
Levi tried to examine himself mentally in the way he had been doing since college, and found—to his surprise—relief. He was so goddamned relieved. It was as if, by kissing him, Nico had settled a debate Levi hadn’t even known he’d still been having with himself. Yes—he was gay. He liked men. He had known, but he hadn’t known. A part of him had still quietly been saying, had always been saying: _but you haven’t kissed a guy yet, have you? What if you don’t like it?_

Now he knew. Now he _had_ kissed a guy, and he _had_ liked it. Kissing Nico hadn’t been anything like kissing girls; that had always been safe, sloppy, soft, and boring. With Nico, it had been rough, sure, and dangerous. Plus, it had been so fucking hot that he had legitimately been in danger of coming in his pants like a teenager at his first school dance. 

In that moment of almost unadulterated relief, Levi couldn’t help but curse all the time wasted kissing Susie Makowitz when he could have been kissing _David_ Makowitz. (He couldn’t have, of course: even if David was gay—and he was 90 percent sure that David was not—David had been such a transparent pot head that his mother would rather have sent Levi off to boarding school than see him start hanging around David with any regularity.) 

But despite the desire to go back in time and stop himself trying to enjoy make-out sessions with girls, he was so relieved that he thought it must be coming off him in visible waves: he was gay, and now he knew that, with such certainty it could have been tattooed on him. He was so relieved he almost forgot to be angry. 

But the anger was still there, and it was starting to come back to the forefront of his mind with force. What the fuck gave Nico the right to accuse him of going into a “shame spiral”? As if Levi was some homophobic, bigoted... Republican! The anger rose in him, even as it battled inwardly with Levi’s desire to find Nico, wherever he was hiding, and push him back against another wall to kiss him until neither of them could see straight. 

Levi leaned forward with a groan of frustration, resting his head on his forearms, before steeling himself with an effort and straightening up. He nodded, once, at the mirror, with a firm look of determination he didn’t quite feel, and turned to leave. Until this worked itself out, he had lives to save.

**Author's Note:**

> This may have been done before, I literally just walked into this fandom last week. Whew, what a pair of cuties. 
> 
> Also please feel free to comment if you find a mistake, or something sounds off- I don't actually watch much Grey's Anatomy and I wrote this exTREMEly quickly.


End file.
